Embracing grief

peeking through the pain

peeking through the pain

Life is hard. People say it, but who really believes it? Especially an optimist like me. Ah, to be a pessimist and just KNOW that life is going to be hard, and expect it. The Bible says not to be surprised when painful trials come our way. But me? Totally shocked every time. Stunned, immobilized. Like my foundation has been rocked and where do I stand? If life just sucks and that’s just it, what’s the point?

Ah, grasshopper, you have much to learn. (Speaking to myself.)

“Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial  you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when His glory is revealed…So then, those who suffer according to God’s will, should commit themselves to their faithful Creator and continue to do good.”     1 Peter 4:12,13,19

“Present yourself a living sacrifice… for this is your reasonable service.” Rom 12:1

Seriously, with words like painful trial, sufferings, living sacrifice, how is it possible that I still think life will be basically good? Could it be? Could God ACTUALLY call a person to a ministry that knowingly hurts, a place that WILL cause suffering?

I remember a time in my life when things were so very wonderful, I worried that I would lose that closeness with God. I know that I need to need God. I am too self-reliant. I remember actually asking God to give me some challenges, some trial, to grow me and make me more useful. Yep, I seriously asked for that. Crazy right?! So here I am.

Friends are getting cancer, family members are dying. Life is hard. I italicize it because it hurts to even say it, I whisper it. It hurts to the core of my soul, my heart is damaged. There was a time it felt shattered. Now it is torn, bruised, a chunk gone that will be always missing. So what’s the point? Why bother? What’s life FOR?

In a world where every post and Facebook picture is about YOU taking control of YOUR life and only befriending those who make YOU feel good, because it’s all about YOU. You bet your socks that life is going to feel pointless. God made us for more than just serving ourselves and focusing on ourselves. Life HAS to be bigger than that.

What’s life for? Life is for serving God in a way that takes more than just what I have to give. It takes more than ME. Our purpose needs to be more than what I am comfy and feel-good doing. It has to be more than serving my greed, serving my selfish ambition, serving my pride.

  1. Life should be a challenge. Expect pain, expect suffering, grief, trials, learn to be a living sacrifice.
  2. Life is about more than the ministry, the suffering, what it’s for. It’s about Who it’s for- our Faithful Creator.

Those who suffer according to God’s will, should commit themselves to their faithful Creator and continue to do good.         1 Peter 4:19

So what suffering is according to God’s will? I guess that depends on how much Sovereignty you believe God has. I did something according to God’s will, what God called me to do- Foster kids. I am suffering. So what’s next? Be immobilized to uselessness? It says, “Commit themselves to their faithful Creator and continue to do good.” Ahhh, I love the Faithful Creator. He made me special, just the way He wants me, optimist and all. He has a plan for me. It’s like a big hug. Now to continue to do good…



About Christine

I'm a bit of a health nut and not ashamed of it! God, family and Missions are huge passions and driving forces in my life. I have had fibromyalgia for most of my life and am in the process of a treatment that is gonna give me my life back! Join me in my journey to wellness, make some new friends and maybe encourage someone else along the way!
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2 Responses to Embracing grief

  1. Mary-Ann Reddekopp says:

    Wonderfully written, Chris! It is a glimpse of what God is doing in and through you. I tell our kids often, “Life is hard, but God is good!” So true that difficulty and pain draw us to our knees, dependant on Him, our loving Abba God. Love you, Christine!

    • Christine says:

      Hey MA!! 😀 great to hear from you!
      And so true. Remember someone used to say to us in VTI, ‘life sucks and then you die.” LOL! I think about that alot. Back then I had no idea what she was talking about, now I totally get it! And Paul in the Bible saying to live is Christ, to die is gain, totally get that now too! lol! So thankful for the way God continues to work in our hearts to change us and grow us up in Him. He’s so faithful <3 love you too!

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